Bill Maher Quotes

  • Suicide is man's way of telling God, 'You can't fire me - I quit.
    ~ Bill Maher
  • Men are only as loyal as their options.
    ~ Bill Maher
  • Can we go back to using Facebook for what it was originally for - looking up exes to see how fat they got?
    ~ Bill Maher
  • I was raised half Jewish and half Catholic. When I'd go to confession, I'd say, "Bless me, Father, for I have sinned - and you know my attorney, Mr Cohen".
    ~ Bill Maher
  • Television is a method to deliver advertising like a cigarette is a method to deliver nicotine.
    ~ Bill Maher
  • I think capital punishment works great. Every killer you kill never kills again.
    ~ Bill Maher
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT