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~ George Carlin, 1937-2008We drink too much, smoke too much, spend too recklessly, laugh too little, drive too fast, get too angry, stay up too late, get up too tired, read too little, watch tv too much. We have multiplied our possessions but reduces our values. We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often. We've learned how to make a living but not a life. We've added years to life, not life to years. -
~ George CarlinThose who dance are considered insane by those who cannot hear the music. -
![Have you ever noticed that the lawyer always smiles more than the client?]()
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~ George CarlinHave you ever noticed that the lawyer always smiles more than the client? -
~ George CarlinThe reason I talk to myself is because I'm the only one whose answers I accept. -
![The reason they call it the American Dream is because you have to be asleep to believe it.]()
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~ George CarlinThe reason they call it the American Dream is because you have to be asleep to believe it. -
~ George CarlinIf you live long enough, sooner or later everybody you know has cancer. -
![Fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.]()
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~ George CarlinFighting for peace is like screwing for virginity. -
~ George CarlinHere's all you have to know about men and women. Women are crazy, Men are stupid. And the main reason women are crazy is that men are stupid. -
~ George CarlinReligion is like a pair of shoes.....Find one that fits for you, but don't make me wear your shoes. -
~ George CarlinDeath is caused by swallowing small amounts of saliva over a long period of time.
