| Ideas are like children, our own are wonderful! |
| Is knowing that you don't understand Women is understanding Women! |
| Practice makes the man perfect, what about woman? |
| Alcoholism is the only disease that tries to convince you that you don't have it. |
| Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and announce your name? |
| Don't get into a pissing contest with a skunk. |
| Sarcasm is humour with an attitude. |
| Never hit a man with glasses - hit him with a baseball bat. |
| Sometimes the best helping hand you can give is a good, firm push. |
| Sometimes the things one says 'sarcastically' are what one really is feeling deep down. |