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Woman: Feminine curves that hold masculine nerves. -
Weird is just a side effect of being awesome. -
![Beware of half truths... you may get the wrong half!]()
Upload to Facebook Beware of half truths... you may get the wrong half! -
I always learn from the mistakes of others who followed my Advice. -
Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. -
I did such an excellent job at being born that I even got a certificate for it! -
Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired! -
The curse of being the last one at the party is paying the check. -
Once, during Prohibition, I was forced to live for days on nothing but food and water. -
People who throw their weight around rarely pull it!
