| Marriage is an adventure, like going to war. |
| Marriage is like Pi - natural, irrational, and very important. |
| A man is the head of the family, the wife is the neck. The neck turns the head exactly the way it wants. |
| All men make mistakes, but married men find out about them sooner. |
| I love being married. I was single for a long time and I just got sick of finishing my own sentences. |
| A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after that , is the beginning of a new argument. |
| It's amazing how easy it is for a man to understand a wife - when she isn't his. |
| A man who thinks marriage is a 50-50 proposition, does not understand either a woman or the percentage! |
| I had nothing against women till I married one, now I have nothing! |
| I am in total control, but don't tell my wife. |