| Faithful Husband: One whose alimony check is always on time |
| A bachelor is a man who is free to choose, and chooses to be free. |
| Marriage is the hangover from the intoxication of passion. |
| There is only one way to be happily married & when I find that, I shall get married! |
| Marriages are based on believing you won the arguments. |
| Every man becomes a Freedom Fighter, immediately after marriage. |
| My wife found a way to save her money: she spends mine. |
| My wife divorced me because of illness. She got sick of me. |
| A husband is a man who lost his liberty in the pursuit of happiness. |
| A married man can do anything he likes if his wife don't mind. |