| Got kleptomania? Take something for it. |
| Medical insurance is what allows people to be ill at ease. |
| I just got the bill for my surgery. Now I know why those doctors were wearing masks. |
| We've made great medical progress in the last generation. What used to be merely an itch is now an allergy. |
| The best vitamin to be a happy person is B1 |
| Vitamins are good for what ails you. Viagra is good for what fails you. |
| Drugs cause amnesia and other things I can't remember. |
| Drugs may lead to nowhere, but at least it's the scenic route. |
| A pessimist's blood type is always B-negative. |
| Anyone who goes to a psychiatrist ought to have his head examined. |