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The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting. - Gloria Leonard |
| To succeed with the opposite sex, tell her you're impotent. She can't wait to disprove it. -Cary Grant |
| My girlfriend told me that she was seeing another man. I told her to rub her eyes. -Emo Philips |
| I blame my mother for my poor sex life. All she told me was, 'the man goes on top and the woman underneath'. For three years my husband and I slept on bunk beds. -Joan Rivers |
| Graze on my lips; and if those hills be dry, stray lower, where the pleasant fountains lie. -William Shakespeare |
| Sex is like art. Most of it is pretty bad, and the good stuff is out of your price range. -Scott E. Roeben |
| Love is not the dying moan of a distant violin- it's the triumphant twang of a bedspring. -S. J. Perelman |
| An erection at will is the moral equivalent of a valid credit card. -Alex comfort |
| Not only is life a bitch, but it is always having puppies. -Adrienne Gusoff |
| I'm definitely claustrophobic. I have a morbid fear of tight spaces. Thankfully, with my girlfriend, I'll never have a problem with that. -Scott E. Roeben |