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A guy walks into a shoe store and asks for a pair of shoes, size 8. The obviously well trained salesman says, "But sir, you take an 11 or eleven-and-a-half."
"Just bring me a size eight."
The sales guy brings them, and the man stuffs his feet into them and stands up in obvious pain. He turns to the salesman and says, "I`ve lost my house to the I.R.S., I live with my mother-in-law, my daughter ran off with my best friend, my business has filed Chapter 11, and my son just told me he was gay. The only pleasure I have left is to come home at night and take my shoes off."
- Computer lingo meaning for a farmer! LOG ON: Making the wood stove hotter
LOG OFF: Don`t add wood
MONITOR : Keep an eye on the wood stove
MEGAHERTZ: When a big log drops on your barefoot in the morning
FLOPPY DISK : What you get from piling... - Wedding vows ! During the wedding rehearsal, the groom approached the pastor with an unusual offer. 'Look, I`ll give you $100 if you`ll change the wedding vows. When you get to me and the part where I`m to promise to...
- Witness` testimony ! A witness to an automobile accident was testifying. The following exchange took place between the lawyer and the witness:
The lawyer: 'Did you actually see... - What computer acronyms really stand for: ISDN - It Still Does Nothing
APPLE - Arrogance Produces Profit-Losing Entity
WWW - World Wide Wait
DOS - Defunct Operating... - Slot or ATMs ! I was on vacation, playing the slot machines. It was my first time in a casino, and I wasn`t sure how the machines operated.
'Excuse me.' I said to a...
