| Three high steel building workers break for lunch and sit down high above the city. First worker opens his lunch box and complains, "Not lentils and rice again today, Every day, lentils & rice, lentils & rice. If I have lentils & rice again tomorrow I will throw myself from this building." Second worker opens his lunch box and exclaims, "Not butter chicken & rice again. Every day chicken & rice. If I have that again tomorrow I`ll throw myself off too." The last worker, a blonde opens his lunch box and said, "Not baked macaroni and cheese again. Every day the same baked macaroni and cheese. If I have that one more time tomorrow I`ll throw myself off with you guys." The next day at lunch, the first worker opens his lunch and cries, "Lintils and rice.?!?" He throws himself off the building from the 20th floor! The second worker his lunch and sees that he has butter chicken and rice again and throws himself off, too! The blonde opens his lunch and shouts, "Baked macaroni and cheese again." and throws himself off as well! The next day at the combined funeral the wife of the first worker stands up and tearfully says, "If I only knew he didn`t like lentils and rice, I would never have made it for his lunch." The wife of the second worker stands and says, "I always thought he liked butter chicken. If I knew he hated it I would never have made it for his lunch." The wife of the blonde stands and says, "I don`t understands it.. He always made his own lunch!!! |
| Mildred was a 93 year old woman who was particularly despondent over the recent death of her husband. Not able to handle being alone, she decides to kill herself and join him in death. She starts to think about quick and easy ways, and remembers abouther husband`s old Army pistol. With that thought, she decides to shoot herself in the heart, since it was so badly broken anyway. Not wanting to miss the vital organ and become a vegetable and burden on one of her children, she decides to call her doctor`s and inquire as to just exactly where the heart could be found on a woman. Her doctor advises her that it could be found just below her left breast. Later that night, Mildred was admitted to the hospital with a gun shot wound to her knee. |
Good deed! An air force officer goes to heaven and at the gate St Peter asks him if he has ever done anything in his life that he believes makes him worthy of admittance to heaven. The officer replies... 
Millionaires ! After days in the wilderness Santa and Banta stumble into a bar in the wild north in J&K and ask for two beers.Unfortunately they`ve got no money and the barman won`t give them credit. Just then a Kashmiri walks in with a terrorist`s head under his arm.