Am I Pregnant?

A girl walked up to the information desk in a hospital and asked to see an "upturn."

"I think you mean the intern, don't you?" asked the nurse on duty.

"Yes," said the girl. "I want to have a contamination."

"You mean examination," the nurse corrected her.

"Well, I want to go to the fraternity ward, anyway."

"I'm sure you mean the maternity ward."

To which the girl replied, "Upturn, intern, contamination, examination, fraternity, maternity what's the difference? All I know is I haven't demonstrated in two months and I think I'm stagnant."