A doctor wanted to get off work and go hunting, so he approached his assistant.
"Paddy, I am going hunting tomorrow. I don't want to close the clinic. I want you to take care of the clinic and take care of my patients."
"Yes, sir!" answers Paddy.
The doctor goes hunting and returns the following day and asks: "So, Paddy, how was your day?"
Paddy told him that he took care of three patients.
"The first one had a headache so I gave him Tylenol."
"Bravo, and the second one?" asks the doctor.
"The second one had stomach burning and I gave him Malox, sir." says Paddy.
"Bravo, bravo! You're good at this and what about the third one?" asks the doctor.
"Sir, I was sitting here and suddenly the door opened and a woman entered. Like a flame, she undressed herself, taking off everything including her bra, her panties and lied down on the table. She spread her legs and shouted: 'HELP ME! For five years I have not seen any man!'" "Thunderin' Lard Jayzus, Paddy, what did ye do?" asks the doctor.
"I put drops in her eyes." !!!!!