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A woman walks into her accountant`s office and tells him that she needs to file her taxes.
The accountant says, "Before we begin, I`ll need to ask a few questions."
He gets her name, address, social security number, etc. and then asks, "What is your occupation?"
The woman replies, "I`m a whore."
The accountant balks and says, "No, no, no. That will never work. That is much too crass. Let`s try to rephrase that."
The woman, "OK, I`m a prostitute."
"No, that is still too crude. Try again."
They both think for a minute, then the woman states, "I`m a chicken farmer."
The accountant asks, "What does chicken farming have to do with being a whore or a prostitute?"
"Well, I raised over 5,000 cocks last year."
- Do 69! A girl brings a guy home one night. They get into her apartment and immediately she suggests that they do '69'.
'What the hell is that?' asks the guy. - Types of Bras! A man walked into the ladies department of Macy`s and shyly said to the woman at the counter, 'I`d like to buy a bra for my wife.'
'What type of bra?' asked the clerk. - Size does matters! Two old ladies were waiting for a bus and one of them was smoking a cigarette. It started to rain, so the old lady reached into her purse, took out a condom, cut off the tip and slipped it over her cigarette and continued to smoke.
Her friend saw this and said, 'Hey that`s a good idea! What is it that you put over your cigarette?' - Wetting fingers! Banta and his wife were lying in bed. Mrs Banta had curled up ready for sleep and Banta put his bed lamp on to read a book.
- Santa & Viagra! Santa comes to a doctor and, twitching his fingers and stuttering, finally manages to say, 'Doctor, I have a sexual performance problem. Can you help me?'
