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Good: Your wife is pregnant.
Bad: It`s triplets
Ugly: You had a vasectomy five years ago
Good: Your wife s not talking to you
Bad: She wants a divorce
Ugly: She`s a lawyer
Good: Your son is finally maturing
Bad: He`s involved with the woman next door
Ugly: So are you
Good: Your son studies a lot in his room
Bad: You find several porn movies hidden there.
Ugly: You`e in them
Good: Your hubby and you agree, no more kids
Bad: You can`t find your birth control pills
Ugly: Your daughter borrowed them
Good: Your husband understands fashion
Bad: He`s a cross-dresser
Ugly: He looks better than you
Good: You give the "birds and bees" talk to your daughter
Bad: She keeps interrupting
Ugly: With corrections
Good: The postman`s early
Bad: He`s wearing fatigues and carrying a shotgun
Ugly: You gave him nothing for Christmas
Good: Your son is dating someone new
Bad: It`s another man
Ugly: He`s your best friend
Good: Your daughter got a new job
Bad: As a hooker
Ugly: Your co-workers are her best clients
- Bigger! One day when the teacher walked to the black board, she noticed someone had written the word `pe*nis` in tiny letters. She turned around, scanned the class looking for the guilty face. Finding none, she quickly erased it, and began her...
- Have your share ! An Indian and a Pakistani are out for a morning jog, when they happen upon a goat with his head stuck in a fence. Indian says; come on Paki, I’ll show you how we`d handle this in Rajasthan. He pulls his pants down and...
- Bishop`s Horse? A priest wanted to raise money for his church, and seeing that there was a fortune in horse racing, he decided to purchase a horse and enter it in the races. However, at the local auction, the going price for horses was so steep that the priest ended up buying a donkey. The priest figured that since he had the donkey...
- Fallen ? An old priest when got sick of all the people in his parish who kept confessing to adultery said to them, 'If I hear one more person confess to adultery, I`ll quit!
everyone liked him, so they came up with a code word...Read for the code word !! - Drinks or ? Jerry Falwell was seated next to President Clinton on a recent flight. After the plane was airborne, the flight attendant came around for drink orders.
The President asked for a whiskey & soda, which was...
