| A woman is very distressed because she has not been married very long and yet her husband has lost interest in sex. So she goes to see her doctor and relays the problem. The doctor doesn't seem worried at all and tells her that it is nothing serious and her husband has merely lost his animal instincts. The doctor tells her to crumble some dog biscuits on her husband's cereal every morning without telling him, and little by little this will bring out the savage beast in him. He wishes her good luck and tells her to come back in a week with a progress report. A week later the woman returns to the doctor, who asks how her husband is. "He's dead," she replies. "Dead?" the doctor asked. "Yes. He was sitting in the driveway licking his balls, and I backed over him with the car." |
| A married couple at a Zoo walks past a gorilla enclosure. Says the woman, "Mark, do you know that gorillas are the only animals which resemble men in their behavior? Look, seeing that no one is looking, I'll expose one of my breasts to it & see how horny it gets just as men do." Mary then exposes one of her breasts, and, sure enough the gorilla gets excited and grabs the bars of the enclosure as if it wanted to break free. "See," says the woman, "Now, I know why you react the way you do; men can't control their animal instincts just like gorillas can't." Says Mark, "Now expose both breasts and let us see what happens." The woman exposes both breasts to the gorilla and it gets very excited and is now desperately trying to escape from the enclosure. Says Mark, "This is incredible, now, pull your skirt up, turn around and expose your bum and let us see what happens!" The woman pulls her skirt up, turns around with her bum to the gorilla, which by now, was extremely aroused, breaks free from the enclosure, grabs the woman and starts yanking the clothes off her. The woman yells, "Mark , what do I do now? Please, help me!" Mark replies, "Now, tell him you have a headache and you're not in mood... Let us see if Gorillas and Men are the same." |
Aroma of Love There was once a great actor who could no longer remember his lines. After many years he finds a theatre where they are prepared to give him a chance to shine again... 
What is Love? The teacher asked the class if anyone could give the class an example of love. Little Susie stood up and said, "I saw two robins making a nest together, I think that is love... 
Frustrated Wife After less than a year of marriage, this lady was becoming more and more frustrated. Her husband worked very long hours and was no longer interested in Bonking. Plucking up her courage... 
Sexual Vitality Two older men are sitting on a park bench talking and one of them asks the other about his sex life. The man answers that he has an excellent sex life and... 
Hot & Cold Sex An elderly couple scheduled their annual medical examination the same day so they could travel together. After the examination, the doctor then said to the elderly man... 
