| Ramta died in a fire and his body was burnt pretty bad. The morgue needed someone to identify the body, so his two best friends, Santa and Banta, were sent for. Santa went in and the mortician pulled back the sheet. Santa said, "Yup, he`s burnt pretty bad. Roll him over." The mortician rolled him over, and Santa said, "Nope, ain`t Ramta." The mortician thought that was rather strange. Then he brought Banta in to identify the body. Banta took a look at him and said, "Yup, he`s burnt real bad, roll him over." The mortician rolled him over and Banta said, "No, it ain`t Ramta." The mortician asked, "How can you tell?" Banta said, "Well, Ramta had two assholes." "What? He had two assholes?" said the mortician. "Yup, everyone in town knew he had two assholes. Every time we went to town, folks would say, `Here comes Ramta with Two assholes.` |
| Two Proctologists were at a medical conference in a resort in outback Australia. They decided to enjoy the local highlights from the back of a camel for $ A 20. The owner warned them that the camel was highly trained to do the rounds of the town, stop briefly at the highlights, then return them to the start of the ride. Under no circumstances, he warned them, were they to get off the camel, otherwise it would return to it's home to eat grass. After some time there was no sign of the camel or doctors and people in queue for the ride were complaining. The owner was losing a lot of money. Eventually the two doctors could be seen forlornly walking back to the operator. "Please don't tell me you got off?" asked the owner incredulously when they arrived. "We're sorry, but we did" they said together, despondently. "But why?…Why would you get off when I told you not to?!" "Well…the camel slowed down at a sight…and a man came along in a Holden, wound the window down, and yelled, 'Look at the two arseholes on the camel!'…and ……… well, we couldn't resist having a look!" |