| An elderly couple were driving across the country. The woman was driving
when she got pulled over by the highway patrol. The officer said, "Ma`am did you know you were speeding?" The woman turns to her husband and asked, "What did he say?" The old man yelled, "He says you were speeding!" The patrolman said, "May I see your license?" The woman turned to her husband and asked, "What did he say?" The old man yelled, "He wants to see your license!" The woman gave him her license. The patrolman said, "I see you are from Texas. I spent some time there once and went on a blind date with the ugliest woman I`ve ever seen." The woman turned to her husband and asked, "What did he say?" The old man yelled, "He thinks he knows you!" |
| Banta was quite inventive and was always trying out new things. One day he thought he'd see just how fast a bicycle could go before it became uncontrollable. He asked his friend, who owned an old Maruti, if he could tie his bike to the bumper of his car to test his theory. His friend said, "Sure." So Banta tied his bike to the back of the car and said to his friend, "I'll ring my bike bell once if I want you to go faster, twice if I want you maintain speed, and repeatedly if I want you to slow down." With that, off they went. Things were going pretty well, with the car driver slowly speeding up to well over 60 kmph. Banta was handling the speed just fine. But, all of sudden, a black Honda came up beside them and before you knew it the fellow driving the Maruti forgot all about Banta and his bicycle and took to drag racing the Honda. A little further down the road sat Officer Santa in his police cruiser, radar gun at the ready. He heard the two cars before his radar flashed 100 kmph. He called into headquarters on his radio, "Hey, you guys aren't going to believe this, but there's a Honda and a Maruti racing out here on Highway 22, and there's a guy on a cycle ringing his bell and waving his arms trying to pass them!" |
| A woman was driving down the highway about 80 miles an hour, when she noticed a motorcycle policeman following her. Instead of slowing down, she picked up speed. When she looked back again, their were two motorcycles following her. She shot up to 90 miles. The next time she looked around, there were three cops following her. Suddenly, she spotted a gas station looming ahead. She screeched to a stop and ran into the ladies' room. Ten minutes later, she innocently walked out. The three cops were standing their waiting for her. Without batting an eye, she said coyly, "I'll bet none of you thought I would make it." |
Santa at KBC Santa is appearing on 'Kaun Banega Crorepati (KBC)' with Amitabh Bachchan.
Caring medicos! Santa took his elderly father to a nursing home to check it out. He sat his father down on a sofa in the main aisleway and went to talk with the administrators.