Genealogy Explained

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    A little girl asked her mother, "How did the human race begin?"

    The mother answered, "God made Adam and Eve and they had children, and so all mankind was made."

    Two days later the girl asked her father the same question, "How did the human race begin?"

    The father answered, "Many years ago there were monkeys from which the human race evolved.

    The confused girl returned to her mother and said, "Mom, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they developed from monkeys?"

    The mother answered, "Well, dear, it is very simple. I told you about my side of the family and your father told you about his."
  • Cosmetic Surgery Two women were having lunch together, and discussing the merits of cosmetic surgery.
    The first woman says, "I need to be honest with you, I'm getting a boob...
  • Drinking is Bad At a Bar, a NUN preaches: Drinking is Bad.
    Man: Have you tried it?
    Nun: No, Never...
  • A matter of Will When her late husband's will was read, a widow learnt he had left the bulk of his fortune to another woman.
    Enraged, she rushed to change the inscription on her spouse...
  • The Good News A doctor enters into a patient's room and informs the patient that he has good news and bad news. He then asks the patient which news he would like to hear...
  • Medical Check-up An old codger goes to visit his doctor about painful peeing. His wife goes with him because the poor old bloke is hard of hearing.
    After an examination the Doctor says
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