Dating Ads for Seniors

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    You can say what you want about Florida, but you never hear of anyone retiring and moving north. These are actual ads seen in 'The Villages'' Florida newspaper. Who says seniors don't have a sense of humour?

    Foxy Lady
    Sexy, fashion-conscious blue-haired beauty, 80's, slim, 5'4' (used to be 5'6').
    Searching for sharp-looking, sharp-dressing companion. Matching white shoes and belt a plus.

    Ling Term Commitment
    Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband. Looking for someone to round out a six-unit plot. Dizziness, fainting, shortness of breath not a problem.

    Senenity Now
    I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean, yoga and meditation. If you are the silent type, let's get together, take our hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times.

    Winning Smile
    Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a dedicated flosser to share rare steaks, corn on the cob and caramel candy.
    Beatles or Stones?
    I still like to rock, still like to cruise in my Camaro on Saturday nights and still like to play the guitar.
    If you were a groovy chick, or are now a groovy hen,let's get together and listen to my eight-track tapes.

    Memories
    I can usually remember Monday through Thursday.
    If you can remember Friday, Saturday and Sunday, let's put our two heads together.

    Mint Cindition
    Male, 1932 model, high mileage, good condition, some hair, many new parts including hip, knee, cornea, valves. Isn't in running condition, but walks well.

    Do not regret growing older. It is a privilege denied to many.
  • Most Careless! A Bihari, a Bengali and our Santa were arguing on the hospital ward who was the most careless. The Bihari guy said, "I`m the most careless, this morning I ramped a pavement and went head on...
  • Drunk Driving!!! This happened to an Englishman in France who was totally drunk. The French policeman stops his car and asks the gentleman if he has been drinking. With great difficulty, the Englishman admits that he has been...
  • The 10 Best Caddy Replies Golfer: Think I`m going to drown myself in the lake.
    Caddy: Think you can keep your head down that long?
    Golfer: I`d move heaven and earth to break 100 on this course.
    Caddy: Try heaven, you`ve already...
  • Honeymoon Package! Woman goes to travel agent and says, "Honeymoon Ka Sasta Package Hai koi?"
    Agent says, "Ji Mam, 50k mein 3N/4D in Bangkok including flight hotel and food....
  • The Wrong Side! I went into the confessional box after years of being away from the Church. Inside I found a fully equipped bar with Guinness on tap. On one wall, there`s a row of decanters with fine Irish whiskey and Waterford crystal...
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