OLD Is When....

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    'OLD' IS WHEN...
    Your sweetie says, 'Let's go upstairs and make love,' and you answer, 'Pick one; I can't do both!'

    'OLD' IS WHEN...
    Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes and you're barefoot.

    'OLD' IS WHEN...
    Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.

    'OLD' IS WHEN....
    You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.

    'OLD' IS WHEN....
    You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.

    'OLD' IS WHEN...
    'Getting a little action' means you don't need to take a laxative today.

    'OLD' IS WHEN....
    'Getting lucky' means you find your car in the parking lot...

    'OLD' IS WHEN...
    An 'all nighter' means not getting up to use the bathroom.

    'OLD' IS WHEN....
    You're not sure if these are facts or jokes.
  • Pluck Yew! Well, now, here`s something I never knew before, and now that I know it, I feel compelled to send it on to my more intelligent friends in the hope that they, too, will feel edified. Before the Battle of Agincourt in 1415...
  • Good Golfer! A golfer teed up his ball on the first tee, took a mighty swing and hit his ball into a clump of trees. He found his ball and saw an opening between 2 trees he thought he could hit through. Taking out his 3-wood...
  • Aaj Ki Sachchai Kitni Ajeeb Duniya Hai Ye, Yahan Auratein Dusri Auraton Ki Buraiyaan Karti Nahin Thakti, Jabki Aadmi Dusri Auraton Ki Tareef Karte Nahin Thakte. Aadmi Sach Mein Mahaan Hai.
    Humne 5 Aadmiyon Ko Beer...
  • Attaining Enlightenment A disciple went to his guru asking for tips to attain enlightenment. The guru advised, "Take a mala and go up into the Himalayas and meditate."
    The disciple went away. Several months later, the guru paid...
  • Blind Pilots! An airliner ? is fully boarded and ready to push-off from the gate, when two blind pilots enter the main cabin. The pilots both are wearing dark glasses, one is using a guide dog and the other is tapping his way along the...
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