| As we all prepare to start a new year, it is time again to make those ever so important New Year's Resolutions. Here is my list of recent years' resolutions and the revised ones for 2018. Resolution #1 2015: I will try to be a better husband to Mona. 2016: I will not leave Mona. 2017: I will try for reconciliation with Mona. 2018: I will try to be a better husband to Priya. Resolution #2 2015: I will stop looking at other women. 2016: I will not get involved with Priya. 2017: I will not let Priya pressure me into another marriage. 2018: I will stop looking at other women. Resolution #3 2015: I will not let my boss push me around. 2016: I will not let my sadistic boss drive me to the point of suicide. 2017: I will stick up for my rights when my boss bullies me. 2018: I will tell Dr. Hodger and the group about my boss. Resolution #4 2015: I will read at least 20 good books a year 2016: I will read at least 10 books a year. 2017: I will read 5 books a year. 2018: I will finish Space. Resolution #5 2015: I will not get upset when Andy and Mandy make jokes about my baldness. 2016: I will not get annoyed when Andy and Mandy kid me about my toupee. 2017: I will not lose my temper when they tell the guys I wear a girdle. 2018: I will not speak to Andy and Mandy. Resolution #6 2015: I will get my weight down below 180. 2016: I will watch my calories until I get below 190. 2017: I will follow my new diet religiously until I get below 200. 2018: I will try to develop a realistic attitude about my weight. Resolution #7 2015: I will not take a drink before 5:00 p.m. 2016: I will not touch the bottle before noon. 2017: I will not become a "problem drinker". 2018: I will not miss any AA meetings. Resolution #8 2015: I will not spend my money frivolously. 2016: I will pay off my bank loan promptly. 2017: I will pay off my bank loans promptly. 2018: I will begin making a strong effort to be out of debt by 2018. Resolution #9 2015: I will see my dentist this year. 2016: I will have my cavities filled this year. 2017: I will have my root canal work done this year. 2018: I will get rid of my denture breath this year. Resolution #10 2015: I will go to church every Sunday. 2016: I will go to church as often as possible. 2017: I will set aside time each day for prayer and meditation. 2018: I will try to catch the late night sermonette on TV. |