Stunning Senior Moment

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    A very self-important college freshman attending a recent football game took it upon himself to explain to a senior citizen sitting next to him why it was impossible for the older generation to understand his generation.

    "You grew up in a different world, actually an almost primitive one," the student said, loud enough for many of those nearby to hear. "The young people of today are much more advanced than people your age. We grew up with television, jet planes, space travel, man walking on the moon and the internet. We have cell phones, nuclear energy, electric and hydrogen cars, computers, automated manufacturing, amazing technologies, and...," pausing to take another drink of beer.

    The senior took advantage of the break in the student's litany and said, "You're right, son. We didn't have those things when we were young... so we invented them. Now, you arrogant little shit, what are YOU doing for the next generation?"
  • The Blind Walmart Clerk A lady goes into Walmart to buy a rod and reel for her husband. She doesn`t know which one to get, so walks over to the register. A Walmart associate is standing there with sunglasses on. She says, "Excuse me sir...
  • Tales or Tails? A seafood restaurant had a sign in the window that read, "Big Lobster Tales, $5 each."
    Amazed at the great value, a man stopped in and asked the waitress, "Five dollars each for lobster tails...
  • Live-in Maid A husband and his wife advertised for a live-in maid to cook and do the housework. They hired a lovely lass for the job. She worked out fine, was a good cook, was polite, and kept the house neat. One day...
  • The Cursing Nun This guy unexpectedly got the day off and decided he would spend it on the golf course. After arriving at the club house, he was told that the only way he could play today was if he was willing to play along with three nuns...
  • Hoya! Hoya! A politician gives a stump speech in an Indian reservation, trying to garner the Native American ballot. "If elected, I promise better education for Native Americans," he says. The crowd goes wild, calling out...
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