Building the Chunnel

  •  

    As the UK and French governments began plans for the Chunnel (English Channel Tunnel), they realized they didn't have the ability to build it themselves, so they put the project out for bid. Three teams: a German team, a Japanese team, and a Team from Punjab, led by Santa, submitted proposals and were asked to present their proposals to the selection committee.

    The German team led off the presentations, with their main selling point being their engineering prowess. The German presenter showed their latest generation tunnel boring machines with laser guided accuracy, impressing the committee.

    The German concluded his presentation saying, "For 2 billion Euros, we will bore from both sides of the tunnel, and one year later we will meet in the middle with and be less than 1 meter off!"

    The Japanese had a tough act to follow, but they knew their process quality techniques and enhanced productivity were better. The Japanese presenter showed their latest tunnel boring machines with advanced radar, their acumen in statistical process control, then bowed and stated, "For 1.8 billion Euros, we will bore from both sides of the tunnel, and 9 months later, we will meet in the middle and be less than 1 centimeter off!"

    The Punjabi team knew they were in trouble, but really believed in the work ethic of their people, so they decided to pitch their strengths.

    Team leader Santa looked the committee in the eyes as stated, "For 1 billion Euros and 50,000 cases of Whiskey, we will bore from both sides of the tunnel, hic, and if we don't meet in the middle you'll get TWO tunnels for the price of ONE!"
  • The Life of a Toothbrush A Dentist was conducting a survey: How long do you use your Toothbrush...?
    Indian: There is no fixed time limit doctor, may be years...!!! Initially we use it for brushing our teeth, then we use it for....
  • Don't Mess With Indians American Interviewer: So what`s your email ID ?
    Indian Candidate: Sir, iamanindian@gmail.com
    American Interviewer: And password ?
    Indian: 12345678
  • Sarso Da Tel! Everyone seems to be in such a hurry to scream `racism` these days.
    In London, a customer asked, "Do you have "Sarso Da Tel?"
    The shopkeeper says "Are you a "Punjabi?"
    The guy (clearly offended) says...
  • Signs that Technology has Taken Over Your Life Your stationery is more cluttered than Warren Beatty`s address book. The letterhead lists a fax number, e-mail addresses for two on-line services, and your Internet address...
  • The Breathalyzer Test A policeman pulls over a driver for swerving in and out of lanes on the highway. He tells the guy to blow a breath into a breathalyzer.
    "I can`t do that, officer...
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT