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    Two couples went out golfing together. The men hit first from the men's tee and walked with the ladies to their tee box. The first lady took a mighty swing at the ball, missing it completely, while passing some gas rather loudly in the process.

    No one commented.

    She addressed the ball again but this time she passed just little gas as she made contact with the ball, topping it and moving it only a short distance.

    She said, "I wonder why it didn't go any further?"

    One of the men said, "I don't think you gave it enough gas."
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  • Feeding Pigeons! A difficult independent 75-year-old woman liked sitting by the park feeding the pigeons. One day she brought with her a whole loaf of fresh bread just to feed her daily company. Little by little, pinch by pinch...
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    Warden: Do you have a permit for all these fish?
    Man: No sir. These are all my pet fish...
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    "What for?" his father asks.
    "I`ve got a sure tip on the market...
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