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    A honeymooning couple had purchased a talking parrot and taken it to their room, where much to the groom`s annoyance, the bird kept up a running commentary on their love-making. The next morning, packing to return home, the couple couldn`t close a large suitcase. Figuring they needed more weight on the lid, she said, "Sweetheart, you get on top and I`ll try."
    Still no success. Then he said, "Look. Let`s both get on top and try."
    At that point the parrot yanked away the towel and said, "Zoo or no zoo. This... I gotta see !!!"
  • Blown out of proportion! A successful businessman flew to Vegas for the weekend to gamble. He lost the shirt off his back, and had nothing left but a quarter and the second half of his round trip ticket -- If he could just get to the airport he could get himself home. So he went out to the front of the casino...
  • The betting sailor... There once was a young sailor who couldn`t resist a bet. He would make a bet on anything and he would always win. His shipmates were continually losing their money to him, making them very irritated.

    The Captain decided to have the boy...
  • Better Health Plan... The Queen of England was visiting one of Canada’s top hospitals, and during her tour of the floors she passed a room where a male patient was masturbating. 'Oh my God', said the Queen, 'that is disgraceful, what is the meaning of this?' The Doctor leading the tour explains...
  • Just for a drink ! This guy walks into a bar and two steps in, he realizes it`s a gay bar. When the gay waiter approaches, He says to the customer,'What`s the name of your penis?' The customer says, 'Look, I`m not into any of that. All I want is a drink.' Waiter, 'I`m sorry but I can`t serve you until you tell me the name of your penis. Mine for instance is...
  • The perfect combo ! The old professor was in his usual place in the morning, sitting at the table, reading the paper after breakfast. He came across an article about a beautiful actress that was about to marry a football player who was known primarily for his lack of IQ and...
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