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    A group of men are sitting in a sauna discussing business and stocks when suddenly a cellular phone rings.
    "Hi honey, are you at the club?"
    "Yes, dear."
    "Honey you won`t believe this but I`m standing in front of Giovannis and there`s a beautiful mink on sale in the window."
    "How much is it, dear?"
    "They`re giving it away. Only $5000. Can you believe it?"
    "But you already have fur coats?"
    "Please dear it`s absolutely exquisite!"
    "Fine, fine go ahead and buy it!"
    "Thank you sweetheart. Oh, not to keep you much longer, I passed by the Mercedes dealership this morning and saw their new convertible. It was to die for! I talked to the salesman and the one in the showroom is brand new, leather seats, power everything, gold coloured. What do you think??"
    "Honey, come on, we already have cars!"
    "You promised me that I could get a convertible!"
    "How much is it?"
    "You won`t believe it but he said he`d let us have it for $85,000 fully loaded with all the options!!!"
    "OK, OK, go ahead and purchase it!"
    "I love you, you`re the best husband a wife could ask for. I hope I`m not pushing it, but remember our trip we took to Paris? Remember the Brown`s place with the swimming pool, tennis courts? It`s on the market to be sold. I saw it this morning at the Real Estate agency. If we bought it we would have a perfect place to stay during the cold winter months!!!"
    "I had actually thought about it. You say it`s on the market?"
    "Really, you were actually thinking about it? Can I go make an offer on it? You know it`s not listed very high, and It would be perfect for our type of lifestyle!!"
    "How much is it listed at?"
    "Only $425,000 sweetheart. It`s a steal!"
    "I guess we`ve got money put away. Go ahead and make an offer but no more than $415,000."
    "This is turning out to be a great day! Can`t wait to see you later tonight to celebrate!!!"
    "See you tonight dear."
    The man hangs up the cellular phone and asks, "So, who`s phone is this?"
  • Making a sandwich! A little boy and his mom go to the zoo one day. They`re walking around and looking at the animals they come to the monkey cage, where two monkeys are mating. The little boy asks: 'Mom, what are they doing?'
  • Sperm Bank... A guy in a mask bursts into a sperm bank with a shotgun. 'Open the safe,' he yells at the girl behind the counter.
  • Santa Claus` Qs & As ! Q: Why do reindeer have red noses? A: They are not equipped with ABS and thus tend to bump into things on slippery surfaces. This is why Santa is often seen with a red nose (the sleigh doesn`t have an airbag, either).
  • They got my girlfriend, too!!! Santa walks out of a bar, stumbling back and forth with a key in his hand. A cop on the beat sees him, and approaches. 'Can I help you, Sir?'
  • Guide Dog! A blind man was out with his guide dog one day when they stopped to cross the road. The dog promptly pissed on the blind man`s leg. The blind man then put his hand in his pocket and took out a biscuit. He then leaned down to the dog to give him the biscuit.
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