Annual Physical check up

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    An old man goes to the doctor for his yearly physical, his wife tagging along. When the doctor enters the examination room, he tells the old man, "I need a urine sample, a stool sample and a sperm sample."
    The old man, being hard of hearing, looks at his wife and yells, "WHAT? What did he say? What does he want?"
    His wife yells back, "He needs your underwear."
  • Firmed up! One morning while making breakfast, Santa walked up to his wife and pinched her on her butt and said, 'You know if you firmed this up we could get rid of your girdle.'
  • Do 69! A girl brings a guy home one night. They get into her apartment and immediately she suggests that they do '69'.
    'What the hell is that?' asks the guy.
  • Types of Bras! A man walked into the ladies department of Macy`s and shyly said to the woman at the counter, 'I`d like to buy a bra for my wife.'
    'What type of bra?' asked the clerk.
  • Size does matters! Two old ladies were waiting for a bus and one of them was smoking a cigarette. It started to rain, so the old lady reached into her purse, took out a condom, cut off the tip and slipped it over her cigarette and continued to smoke.
    Her friend saw this and said, 'Hey that`s a good idea! What is it that you put over your cigarette?'
  • Wetting fingers! Banta and his wife were lying in bed. Mrs Banta had curled up ready for sleep and Banta put his bed lamp on to read a book.
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