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    Twelve Monks were about to be ordained. The final test was for them to line up, nude, in a garden while a nude model danced before them. Each monk had a small bell attached to their privates, and they were told that anyone who`s bell rang would not be ordained because he had not reached a state of spiritual purity.
    The model danced before the first monk candidate, with no reaction.
    She proceeded down the line with the same response until she got to the final monk.
    As she danced, his bell rang so loudly, it fell off and clattered to the ground.
    Embarrassed, he bent down to pick up the bell, and eleven other bells began to ring....
  • Milk.... A man walks into a tee shirt store. There are 3 shirts on display.The first has a picture of Richard Nixon with a white mustache. Below the picture is titled...
  • Nuns & St. Peter! There`s a queue of nuns waiting to go into heaven and St. Peter is at the front of the queue with a bowl of holy water. He says to the first nun; 'Have you ever had contact with a man`s penis?' The nun replies, 'Only with the tip of my finger.'
  • Nightmare A man goes into his son`s room to wish him goodnight. His son is having a nightmare - the man wakes him and asks his son if he is OK? The son replies he is scared because he dreamt that Auntie Susie had died. The father assures the son that Auntie Susie is fine and sends him to bed. The next day, Auntie Susie dies.
  • Body cover · A teacher to a class of 8 year olds is trying to get their imaginations going one day so she says to them 'Ok class, now if you could cover your bo dy in anything in the world what would it be and why?'
  • The doggie thing · Three dogs are sitting in the waiting room of a vet`s office. One is a poodle, one is a Schnauzer and the other is a Great Dane.
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