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    Right in the middle of lovemaking, the husband dies of a heart attack. As the funeral arrangements are being made, the mortician informs the widow that he cannot get rid of her dead husband`s rigor mortis hard-on which is sticking straight up in the air and if they don`t do something, it will look odd in the coffin at the funeral.
    The widow tells the guy to cut it off and stick it up her dear departed`s behind. The mortician can`t believe his ears but the widow is adamant, so he does it. During the funeral, friends and relatives of the dead man were concerned to see a tear in the corner of his eye, but the widow assured them that there was no cause to be alarmed.
    Just before the casket is closed, the widow leans in and whispers in the dead man`s ear, "It HURTS, doesn`t it?"
  • An old practice! An attractive young girl, chaperoned by an ugly old lady, entered the doctor`s office. 'We have come for an examination,' said the young girl.
    'Alright,' said the doctor. 'Go behind that pulled curtain...
  • Practical advice! A man comes to the doctor with a long history of migraine headaches. When the doctor does his history and physical, he discovers that his poor patient has had practically every therapy known to man for his migraines and STILL...
  • What the doc is doing? A beautfiul woman walks into a doctors office and the doctor is awestruck. All his professionalism goes out the window. He tells her to take off her pants and he starts rubbing her thighs. He says 'Do you know what I am...
  • Strange addiction! A man went to his doctor, seeking help for his terrible addiction to cigars. The doctor was quite familiar with his very compulsive patient, so recommended an unusual and quite drastic form of aversion therapy.
    'When you go to bed tonight, take one of your cigars, unwrap...
  • Little mercies! There was a world famous painter who, in the prime of her career, started losing her eyesight. She went to see the best eye surgeon in the world. After several weeks of delicate surgery and therapy, her eyesight was restored.
    The painter was so grateful she decided to show her gratitude by repainting...
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