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    A doctor at an (insane) asylum decided to take his inmates to a baseball game. For weeks in advance, he coached his patients to respond to his commands. When the day of the game arrived, everything seemed to be going well. As the national anthem started, the doctor yelled, ``Up nuts!``
    And the inmates complied by standing up. After the anthem he yelled, ``Down nuts!`` And they all sat.
    After a home run he yelled, ``Cheer nuts!`` And they all broke into applause and cheers.
    Thinking things were going very well, he decided to go get a beer and a hot dog, leaving his assistant in charge.
    When he returned there was a riot in progress. Finding his assistant, he asked what happened.
    The assistant replied, ``Well...everything was fine until some guy walked by and yelled, ``PEANUTS!``
  • Bus No. 54! Banta was visiting Delhi for the first time. He wanted to see the Palika Bazaar. Unfortunately, he couldn`t find it, so he asked a police officer for directions, 'Excuse me, officer, how do I get to the Palika Bazaar?'
    The officer replied, 'Wait here at this bus...
  • The mail problem! Santa is speaking to his psychiatrist.
    Santa: 'I`m on the road a lot, and my clients are complaining that they can never reach me.'
    Psychiatrist: 'Don`t you have a phone in your car?'
    Santa: 'That`s a little too...
  • Wagon R ? It seems a farm boy accidentally overturned his wagon load of corn. The farmer who lived nearby heard the noise.
    'Hey Willis!!' the farmer yelled. 'Forget your troubles. Come in with us. Then I`ll help you get the...
  • Troublesome kids! A couple had two little boys, ages 8 and 10, who were excessively mischievous. They were always getting into trouble and their parents knew that, if any mischief occurred in their town, their sons were probably involved. The boys` mother heard that a clergyman in town had been successful...
  • A caption contest! After having resigned as the CM of Bihar, Laloo decides to go modelling. On one occasion, he enters a herd of buffaloes and resting his elbows on the back of the cattle he poses for the...
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