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    One Saturday morning, a teacher came up with a novel way to motivate her class. She told them that she would read a quote and the first student to correctly identify who said it would receive the rest of the day off.
    She started with, "To err is nature, to rectify error is glory."
    Little Suzy instantly jumped up and said, "George Washingotn."
    "Congratulations," said the teacher, "you may go home."
    The teacher then said, "Ask not what your country can do for you..."
    Before she could finish this quote, another gal belts out, "John F. Kennedy."
    "Very good," says the teacher, "you may go."
    Irritated that he has missed two golden opportunities, Little Johnnie said, "I wish those girls would just shut up."
    Upon overhearing this comment, the outraged teacher demanded to know who said it.
    Johnnie instantly rose to his feet and said, "Bill Clinton. I`ll see you on Monday."
  • Good night ? By the time a Banta pulled into a little town, every hotel room was taken. 'You`ve got to have a room somewhere,' he pleaded. 'Or just a bed, I don`t care where.'
    'Well, I do have a double room with one occupant,' admitted the manager, 'and he might be glad to split the cost. But...
  • Too smart ! A first grade teacher was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, 'Johnny what is your problem?'
    Johnny answered, 'I`m too smart for the first grade. My sister is in the third grade and I`m smarter than she is! I think...
  • Efficient secretary ! Santa comes home with his little daughter, whom he has just taken to work.
    The little girl asks, 'Daddy, I saw you in your office with your secretary. Why do you call her a doll?'
    Feeling his wife, Jeeto`s gaze upon him, Santa explains...
  • Birth-rate budget ! A little town had a high birth rate that had attracted the attention of the sociologists at the state university.
    They wrote a grant proposal; got a huge chunk of money; hired a few additional sociologists, an anthropologist, and a family planning and birth control...
  • Another beer ! Santa comes home from an exhausting day at work, plops down on the couch in front of the television, and tells Jeeto, 'Get me a beer before it starts.'
    His wife, Jeeto, and gets him a beer.
    Fifteen minutes later, Banta says, 'Get me another beer before it starts.'
    Jeeto looks cross and...
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