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A policeman was patrolling a local parking spot overlooking a golf course. He drove by a car and saw a couple inside with the dome light on. There was a young man in the driver`s seat reading a computer magazine and a young lady in the back seat knitting. He stopped to investigate.
He walked up to the driver`s window and knocked. The young man looked up, cranked the window down, and said, "Yes, officer?"
"What are you doing?" the policeman asked.
"What does it look like?" answered the young man. "I`m reading a magazine."
Pointing towards the young lady in the back seat, the officer then asked, "And what is she doing?"
The young man looked over his shoulder and replied, "What does it look like? She`s knitting."
"And how old are you?" the officer then asked the young man.
"I`m nineteen," he replied.
"And how old is she?" asked the officer.
The young man looked at his watch and said, "Well, in about ten minutes she`ll be eighteen."
- Hit it hard ! An old blacksmith relized he was soon going to quit working so hard. So he picked out Santa to become his apprentice. The old fellow was crabby and exacting.
'Don`t ask me a lot of questions,' he told Santa.'Just do whatever I tell you to do.'
One day the old blacksmith took an... -
Santa`s wish Santa is sitting at the end of a bar. He sees a lamp at the end of the table. He walks down to it and rubs it. Out pops a genie.
It says, “I will give you three wishes.”
Santa thinks awhile. Finally he says... - Great Bar ! An Irishman, an Italian, and Banta are in a bar. They are having a good time and all agree that the bar is a nice place.
Then the Irishman says, 'Aye, this is a nice bar, but where I come from, back in Dublin, there`s a better one. At MacDougal`s, you buy a drink, you buy another drink, and MacDougal himself will... - Terrible news ! A man got a call from his doctor who said 'I have some bad news and some terrible news, which would you rather hear first?'
The man says 'The bad news.'
The doctor says 'The lab messed up your tests and when they re-did them, they found out you only have... - You`re Warm Santa was talking to his fiancee, Jeeto, and he said, 'Be honest, how am I as a lover?'
To which Jeeto replied, 'Honey, I would definitely say that you`re warm.'
'Really?' Santa said excitedly.
'Yes, in fact...