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Santa walks into a pharmacy and asks the assistant for some rectum deodorant. The pharmacist, a little bemused, explains to Santa that they don`t sell rectum deodorant, and never have.
Unfazed, Santa assures the pharmacist that he has been buying the stuff from this store on a regular basis, and would like some more.
"I`m sorry", says the pharmacist, "we don`t have any."
"But I always get it here," says Santa.
"Do you have the container it comes in?" asks the pharmacist.
"YES!", said Santa, "I`ll go home and get it."
Santa returns with the container and hands it to the pharmacist who looks at it and says to him, "This is just a normal stick of underarm deodorant."
Annoyed, Santa snatches the container back and reads out loud from the container, "TO APPLY, PUSH UP BOTTOM"
- The terminal diet A man returns from a foreign holiday and is feeling very ill. He goes to see his doctor, and is immediately rushed to the hospital to undergo tests.The man wakes up after the tests in a private room at the hospital, and the phone by his bed rings.
'This is your doctor. We`ve had the results back from your tests and we`ve found that... - Breast feeding A young woman with a baby was shown into the examining room. Dr. Santa examined the baby and then asked the woman, 'Is he breast fed or bottle fed?'
'Breast fed,' replied the woman.
'Strip down to your waist,' Dr. Santa ordered.
The woman did as she was told and Santa examined her... - Get the bag Banta starts a new job, and the boss says, 'If you marry my daughter, I`ll make you a partner, give you an expense account, a Mercedes, and a million rupee annual salary.'
Banta says, 'What`s wrong with her?'
The boss shows him a picture, and she`s hideous. The boss says, 'It`s only fair to tell you, she`s not only... - Heaven or Hell? This woman dies and goes to heaven. While waiting in line, she hears this terrible screaming and moaning. This disturbs her somewhat, so she tracks down St. Peter to find out what is going on.
'Oh, that,' he says, 'that`s just the woman in front of you. They are drilling holes in her back to attach her wings.'
The woman is still a bit upset by this and is... - Blow job !! A woman recently lost her husband. She had him cremated and brought his ashes home. Picking up the urn that he was in, she poured him out on the counter.
She started talking to him, and tracing her fingers in the ashes, she said, 'You know that...