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A farmer had advertised his farm and was showing it to Banta, a prospective buyer. As they walked along a fence line, Banta saw bee hives and stopped. He said, "Those hives are pretty close to the road."
The farmer explained that the bees just made honey and have never stung anyone.
Banta felt unsure about the sale until he proposed that he be tied to a nearby tree, naked, overnight. If he was stung once he would get the farm for free, but if he wasn`t stung then he would pay the farmer double the price.
The farmer agreed and tied the now naked Banta to the tree.
The next morning the farmer saw Banta leaning over and very pale.
"Oh no!" the farmer thought, "He got stung and now I have to give him the farm!"
As he reached Banta, he gently shook him and asked where he got stung and if he needed a doctor.
"No, no, I`m okay," gasped naked Bamta, "I`ll pay you double for the farm, but doesn`t that damn calf have a mother?"
- Who said that ? It was the first day of school and a new student, the son of a Japanese businessman, entered the fourth grade.
The teacher greeted the class and said, 'Let`s begin by reviewing some American history. Who said, 'Give me Liberty, or give me death?'
She saw only a sea of blank faces, except for that of... - Sexual urges ! Captain Santa was transferred to a desert outpost. On his orientation tour he noticed a very old, seedy looking camel tied out back of the enlisted men`s barracks.
Santa asked the Sergeant leading the tour, 'What`s the camel for?'
The Sergeant replied, 'Well sir, it`s a long way from anywhere, and the men have natural sexual... - Men Need Most Banta, a traveling salesman, checked into a futuristic motel. Realizing he needed a haircut before his next day`s meeting, he called down to the desk clerk and asked if there was a barber on the premises.
'I`m afraid not, sir,' the clerk told him, 'but down the hall is a special machine that should serve your purposes.'
Skeptical but intrigued, Banta located the appropriate machine, inserted... - Tried once Well-dressed Banta entered an upscale restaurant in the 17 sector, Chandigarh, and took a seat at the bar.
The bartender came over and asked 'What can I get you to drink, sir?'
Banta responded, 'Nothing, thank you. I tried alcohol once, didn`t like it, and never tried it again.'
The bartender was a bit perplexed, but... - Rectum Deodorant ! Santa walks into a pharmacy and asks the assistant for some rectum deodorant. The pharmacist, a little bemused, explains to Santa that they don`t sell rectum deodorant, and never have.
Unfazed, Santa assures the pharmacist that he has been buying the stuff from this store on a regular basis, and would like...