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    It was a dark, stormy, night. Santa was on his first assignment, and it was guard duty.
    A Brigadier stepped out taking his dog for a walk. The nervous Santa snapped to attention, made a perfect salute, and snapped out "Sir, Good Evening, Sir!"
    The Brigadier, out for some relaxation, returned the salute and said "Good evening soldier, nice night, isn`t it?"
    Well it wasn`t a nice night, but Santa wasn`t going to disagree with the Brigadier, so the he saluted again and replied "Sir, Yes Sir!".
    The Brigadier continued, "You know there`s something about a stormy night that I find soothing, it`s really relaxing. Don`t you agree?"
    Santa didn`t agree, but then Santa was just a soldier, and responded "Sir, Yes Sir!"
    The Brigadier, pointing at the dog, "This is a Golden Retriever, the best type of dog to train."
    Santa glanced at the dog, saluted yet again and said "Sir, Yes Sir!"
    The Brigadier continued "I got this dog for my wife."
    Santa simply said "Good trade Sir!"
  • Suicide !! Suicide !! Banta and his wife, Preeto were shocked when Preeto`s doctor says she has a heart condition that could kill her at any time. She is to avoid stress, eat right, and never, ever have sex again--the strain would be too much.
    So Banta and Preeto reluctantly try to live by these rules. Both get really horny over time, however, and Banta decides he`d better...
  • Stunt plane Santa and and his wife, Jeeto, went to a fair. Santa had never been on an airplane, was fascinated by a stunt plane and asked the pilot how much aride would cost.
    'Rupees one thousand for 3 minutes' the pilot replied.
    'That`s too much' said Santa.
    The pilot thought for a second and then said...
  • Lawyer`s statue A man was browsing in an antique store when he came upon a statue of a rat. He asked the price and the owner said, 'The statue of the rat is $100; the legend behind the statue is another $100.'
    The man agreed to buy only the statue itself, although the owner warned as he left, 'You`ll be back for...
  • Silver jubilee Banta and Preeto decided to celebrate their 25th Wedding Anniversary with a trip to Mumbai. When they entered the hotel and registered, a sweet young woman dressed in a very short skirt became very friendly. Banta brushed her off.
    Preeto objected, 'That young woman was nice, and you were so rude.'
    'Preeto, she`s a prostitute.'
    'I don`t believe you. That sweet...
  • Accident A bloke is driving around in the Australian bush and because it`s Australia his truck has got a `roo bar` on the front that protects it if he hits a kangaroo.
    Suddenly he hits something, so he gets out and sees that there`s a pig wedged between his `roo bar` and his truck.
    He tries to get it out but it`s stuck tight, so he gets on his...
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