-
What happened?" asked the hospital visitor to the heavily bandaged man sitting up in bed.
"Well, I went to the Amusement Park at the weekend and decided to take a ride on the roller coaster. As we came up to the top of the highest loop, I noticed a little sign by the side of the track. I tried to read it but it was very small and I couldn`t make it out. I was so curious that I decided to go round again, but we went by so quickly that I couldn`t see what the sign said. By now, I was determined to read that sign so I went round a third time. As we reached the top, I stood up in the car to get a better view."
"And did you manage to see what the sign said this time?" asked the visitor.
"Yes."
"What did it say?"
"Don`t stand up in the car!"
- Lion tamer Banta: 'I`m going to become a lion tamer.'
Santa: 'That`s crazy, you don`t know nothing about no lion taming.'
Banta: 'Yes I do!'
Santa: 'Well, OK, answer me this. When one of those lions comes at you all roaring and biting, what you gonna do?'
Banta: 'I`ll take that big chair they all carry, and I`ll stick it in his face until... -
Millionaires ! After days in the wilderness Santa and Banta stumble into a bar in the wild north in J&K and ask for two beers.Unfortunately they`ve got no money and the barman won`t give them credit. Just then a Kashmiri walks in with a terrorist`s head under his arm.
The barman shakes his hand and says... - Banta`s wish Banta walks into a restaurant with an ostrich behind him, and as he sits, the waitress comes over and asks for their order.
Banta says, 'I`ll have a burger, fries and a coke,' and turns to the ostrich.
'What`s yours?'
'I`ll have the same' says the ostrich.
A short time later, the waitress returns with the order.
'That will be... - Mine disaster There was a mine in a small town that completely collapsed. One of the engineers who miraculously survived the disaster went into the local watering hole. The bar was empty except for one lonely soul at the other end of the bar.
'Hey bartender' said the Engineer, 'I`ll have a beer and pour another one for my friend down at the end there... -
A Deadly Sneeze? Adolf Hitler was conducting a General Staff meeting, when somebody sneezed.
'Who was that!?' shouted Hitler, whirling around from a wall map of Europe. Nobody said anything.
'I see,' he said, 'I will have 10 of you shot. And maybe then you will tell me who...