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One day a young cowboy and cowgirl decided to get married. After the wedding, they left for their honeymoon. While driving down the road, the new bride sees two cows having sex.
The new bride asks with a sly grin, "What are they doing honey?"
The husband answers, "They`re roping!"
She replies, "Oh, I see!" while trying to hide her knowing expression.
After a few more hours of driving, they pass two horses having sex.
Again the bride asks, "What are they doing honey?"
The husband answers, "They`re roping!"
She replies, "Oh, I see!"
Finally they arrive at their hotel. The couple washed up and started to get ready for bed. When they got in the bed, they started to explore each others` bodies. The bride discovers her husband`s privates.
"What is that?" she asks.
"That`s my rope," he answers.
She slides her hands down further and gasps, "What are those?" she asks.
"They`re my knots," he answers.
Finally the couple begins to make love. After several minutes, the bride says, "Stop honey, wait a minute!
Her husband asks, "What`s the matter honey, am I hurting you?"
"No," the bride replies, "undo those knots, I need more rope.
- Ticklish issue A very modest lady applied for a job at the factory where they made 'Tickle Me Elmo dolls.' It was Friday and almost quitting time and hurriedly the boss told her to report for work on Monday. He quickly explained to her she would be stationed on the assembly line just before the dolls were packed into boxes.
On Monday they started up the line and within twenty minutes had to shut it down because... - Act of God There was a Rabbi whose wife was expecting a baby. The Rabbi went to the congregation and asked for a raise. After much consideration and discussion, they passed a rule that when the Rabbi`s family expanded, so would his paycheck.
After five or six children, this started to get expensive. The congregation decided... - Nugget of gold In a South American mining district, Mrs. Brown presented her husband with a 12 pound baby boy. Mr. Brown was so delighted that he went to the News office and told that he had found a 12 pound nugget of gold as good as any to be found in South America. The paper, naturally, sent a reporter to get particulars. This is what happened:
Reporter-Does Mr. Brown live here?
Mrs.Brown-he does.
Reporter-Is he.. - Have a nice day? There once was a couple of newlyweds named John and Wendy. John told his wife Wendy that he wanted a tattoo! Wendy agreed and said that would be ok. John did not know what the tattoo should say or where he would put it.
So Wendy said, 'Well, if you REALLY loved me, you would get my name tattooed on your pecker.'
John couldn`t back out on that one, so he went to the Tattoo Parlour. The tattoo artist told him that he needed to have an... -
Gambling!! It`s 10:00 PM at a gambling casino. Two bored dealers, our Santa and Banta, are waiting around for someone to walk up and try their luck at the craps table.
A very attractive lady comes in and wants to bet Five lakh rupees on a single roll of the dice. Santa and Banta agree.
She says, 'I hope you don`t mind, but I feel much luckier when I`m...