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One day, Santa, Banta and their friend walked into a bar together. They proceeded to buy a drink.
Just as they where about to enjoy their drink, three flies landed in each of their drinks.
Their friend pushed his beer away from him in disgust.
Banta fished the offending fly out of his beer and continued drinking it as if nothing had happened.
Santa picked the fly out of his drink, held it out over the drink and then started yelling.
"Spit it out, Spit it out, You Bastard, Spit it out!"
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Dead Friend Banta and his friend are out in the country shooting rabbits. Suddenly, Banta`s friend falls right in front of him, throws a quick spasm, then lies perfectly still. He doesn`t seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. In fact, he looks pretty well dead!
Quick, as a flash, horrified Banta whips out his... - Talking parrot! Santa`s wife, Jeeto, goes into a pet store one day.
She says to the clerk, 'I need a pet to keep me company.'
'Well,' replies the clerk. 'How about this nice parrot? He`ll talk to you.'
'Hey, that`s great.' She likes the idea and buys the parrot and takes him home.
Next day, Jeeto comes back to the pet store. 'You know, that parrot... - Suicide Three high steel building workers break for lunch and sit down high above the city.
First worker opens his lunch box and complains, 'Not lentils and rice again today, Every day, lentils & rice, lentils & rice. If I have lentils & rice again tomorrow I will throw myself from this building.'
Second worker opens his lunch box and exclaims... - Roller coaster What happened?' asked the hospital visitor to the heavily bandaged man sitting up in bed.
'Well, I went to the Amusement Park at the weekend and decided to take a ride on the roller coaster. As we came up to the top of the highest loop, I noticed a little sign by the side of the track. I tried to read it but it was... -
Good deed! An air force officer goes to heaven and at the gate St Peter asks him if he has ever done anything in his life that he believes makes him worthy of admittance to heaven. The officer replies...