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Santa was in Telecom deptt. before joining the army. As part of his basic training, he went out on the rifle range. He fired 99 shots at the target, and missed the target with every shot! His Drill Instructor was very upset with him.
"What`s the matter with you?" asked the Drill Instructor. "Why can`t you hit the target? What were you in civilian life?"
"I was a telephone man," replied the Bantat, "and I don`t know why I can`t hit the target. Let me see..."
Banta checked his rifle, checked his rifle again, and checked his rifle a third time. He then put his finger in front of the muzzle, pulled the trigger, and blew the end of his finger off!
"Well," Banta said, writhing in pain, "the bullets are leaving here fine. The trouble must be on the other end!"
- Longest weeks A bible study group was discussing the unforeseen possibility of their sudden death. The leader of the discussion said, 'We will all die some day, and none of us really knows when, but if we did we would all do a better job of preparing ourselves for that inevitable event.'
Everybody shook their heads in agreement with this comment.
Then the leader said... - One Wish Family is driving in their car on holidays. Frog crosses the road and husband, who is driving, is able to stop the car. He gets out an takes the frog and carries him to the side of the road. Frog is grateful, thanks the man and tells him that he will grant him a wish.
Man says: please make my dog win the next dog race.
Frog asks to look at the dog which jumps out of the car. The frog notices... - Bar Riddle Santa took a trip to Sydney, Australia. While in a bar, an Autralian on the next stool spoke to our Santa in a friendly manner.
'Look,' he said, 'let`s have a little game. I`ll ask you a riddle. If you can answer it, I`ll buy you a drink. If you can`t then you buy me one. OK?'
'Yeah, that sounds pretty good,' said Santa.
The Australian said, 'My father and mother had one... - Road Stripers Santa, Banta, and one of their friend, Sunny, tried out for the same job as road stripers. The employer told them they would all work for three days and whoever painted the most would get the job.
At the end of the first day Sunny head had painted 4 miles, Banta had painted 3.5 miles, and Santa had painted... - World War III George W. Bush and Colin Powell are sitting in a bar. A guy walks in and asks the barman, 'Isn`t that Bush and Powell sitting over there?'
The barman says, 'Yep, that`s them.'
So the guy walks over and says, 'Wow, this is a real honor. What are you guys doing in here?'
Bush says...