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Once, there was a man who was upset by his past deeds that he decided to visit a church and confess all of his sins. When he arrived at the church, he walked to the confession area and spoke to the pastor.
"Father, I am sinful."
"Yes son, just tell me what have you done, the Lord will forgive you."
"Father, I have a steady relationship with my girlfriend. It`s been 3 years and nothing serious ever happened between us. Yesterday, I visited her house and nobody was at home except for her sister. We were alone and I slept with her."
"That`s bad my boy. Fortunately you realize your mistake."
"Father, last week I went to her office to look for her, but nobody was around except for one of her colleagues, so I slept with her too."
"That`s not very good of you."
"Father, last month, I went to her uncle`s house to look for her. Nobody was around except for her auntie, and I slept with her too."
"Father? ......... Father?" suddenly this guy realized that there was no response from the Father. He walked over and discovered that the Pastor was not there. So he began searching for him.
"Father? Where are you?"
He searched high and low, and finally he found him hiding under the table behind the piano.
"Father, why are you hiding here?"
"Sorry son, suddenly I remembered there is nobody around here except me."
- Hemophiliac? A streetwalker was visiting her doctor for a regular checkup.
'Any specific problems you should tell me about?' the doctor asked.
'Well, I have noticed lately that if I get even the tiniest cut, it seems to bleed for hours,' she replied. 'Do you think I might be a hemophiliac?'
'Well... - Reality! A teenager comes home from school with a writing assignment. He asks his father for help. 'Dad, can you tell me the difference between potential and reality?'
His father looks up, thoughtfully, and then says, 'Let`s make a demonstration out of this. Go ask your mother if she would sleep with... - Viagra`s side effects A woman asks her husband if he`d like some breakfast.'Chicken and eggs, perhaps? A slice of toast? Grapefruit and coffee to follow?'
'Nah,' he says. 'It`s this Viagra - it`s really taken the edge off my appetite.'
At lunch time she asks, 'How about a bowl of homemade soup, homemade muffins, or maybe... - AIDS virus!! There was a Russian, an Italian and Banta on death row. The warden gave them a choice of three ways to die:
1. to be shot
2. to be hung
3. to be injected with the AIDS virus for a slow death.
So the Russian said... - Talking parrot A honeymooning couple had purchased a talking parrot and taken it to their room, where much to the groom`s annoyance, the bird kept up a running commentary on their love making.
Finally the groom threw a large towel over the cage and threatened to give the parrot to the zoo if he didn`t quit it.
The next morning...