-
A woman had 8 children, all of them boys. So, one day a magazine sent a journalist to her house for an interview.
He asked her about the boys and what their names were; she said, "Johnnie".
"Right", he said, "what about that blond one over there?"
"Johnnie", she said.
"Oh, and the tall one with the freckles?"
"Johnnie", she said.
"Well, and the little chubby one with the baseball cap?"
"Johnnie", she said.
"Are all your boys called Johnnie?" he asked, "Isn`t that terribly complicated?"
"Not at all", she said, "it makes everything very easy, actually. When I shout: Johnnie, tea is ready!, they all come. When I say: Johnnie, it`s time for bed!, they all go to bed."
"I see. But what if you want only one of them?"
"No problem." she answers. Then I call them by their surnames."
- Where`s the ball? 'How was your golf game, dear?' asked Jack`s wife Tracy.
'Well, I was hitting pretty well, but my eyesight`s gotten so bad I couldn`t see where the ball went.'
'But you`re seventy-five years old, Jack!' admonished his wife, 'Why don`t you take my brother Scott along?'
'But he`s eighty-five and doesn`t even... - Santa facing Lee In a Test between India and Australia, the fiery Bret Lee was sending quivers down the Indian spine. The new batsman, our Santa, walked slowly to the crease, not feeling unlike a lamb at the slaughter house.
As Lee thundered in, suddenly Santa stood up in the crease, and signalled that he wanted the sight screen adjusted. Adjustments were made and... - Beneficial walking! The room was full of pregnant women and their partners, and the Lamaze class was in full swing.
The instructor was teaching the women how to breathe properly, along with informing the men how to give the necessary assurances at this stage of the plan.
The teacher then announced..., - Objecting wives! There were three friends that always wanted to play golf every Saturday afternoon, but couldn`t because of their wives objections.
So one day after many years they finally got together on the golf course and were waiting at the first tee when one guy said... - Fallen!!! There was an old priest who got sick of all the people in his parish who kept confessing to adultery.
One Sunday, in the pulpit, he said, 'If I hear one more person confess to adultery, I`ll quit!'
Well, everyone liked him, so they came up with a code word. Someone who had committed adultery would say...