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My girlfriend and me were dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream!
There was only one thing bothering me, quite much indeed, and that was my mother-in-law to be. She was a career woman, smart, but most of all beautiful and sexy, who sometimes flirted with me, quite obviously too, and made me feel uncomfortable.
One day, she called me and asked me to come over, to check the invitations. So I went. She was alone, and when I arrived, she whispered to me, that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she can`t overcome. So before I get married and commit my life to her daughter, she wants to make love to me just once..
What could I say? I was in total shock, and couldn`t say a word.
So, she said, I`ll go to the bedroom, and if you are up for it, just come and get me.
I just watched her delicious behind as she went up the stairs. I stood there for a moment, and then turned around and went to the front door... I opened it, and stepped out of the house.
Her husband was standing outside, and with tears in his eyes, hugged me and said, we are very happy and pleased, you have passed our little test. We couldn`t have asked for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family.
Lesson learned: Always keep your condoms in your car.
- Fruits of Luv! Banta nad Preeto were spending their honeymoon in a remote log cabin resort way up the mountains. They had registered on Saturday and they had not been seen for 3 days.
An elderly couple ran the resort, and they were getting concerned about the welfare of these newlywed... - Religious!!! A young man walks into a drug store and asks the cashier for some condoms.
The cashier says 'Got a good one?'
'Yup, hot date tonight! This ones pretty much in the bag… she`s sexy and givin` it up tonight!' the man replies.
A little while later the man goes to his girlfriends house and they... - Banta`s Headache Banta has been suffering from severe headaches for years with no relief. After trying all the usual cures he`s referred to a headache specialist by his family doctor. The doctor asks him what his symptoms are and he replies.
'I get these blinding headaches; kind of like a knife across my scalp and.... - Nice Advice One day, farmer Bob was in town picking up supplies for his farm. He stopped by the hardware store and picked up a bucket and an anvil, then stopped by the livestock dealer to buy a couple of chickens and a goose.
Now he had a problem... - Trot !!! This guy owns a horse farm and gets a call from a friend.
'I know this midget with a speech impediment who wants to buy a horse and I`m sending him over'.
The midget arrives and the owner asks him if he wants a male or female...