Violent erection!

  •  

    A guy has a crush on a girl at his work. He is dying to ask her out on a date, but every time he sees her, he gets the biggest erection ever. There is nothing he can do to control it.
    After some time, he decides to get her phone number and call her up. This way, he won`t have to see her and won`t get too excited. He ends up asking her out and she says yes.
    He figures what he`ll do is tie his penis to his leg so when he sees her it`ll be tied to his leg and she`ll never notice it.
    He gets to her house. When he knocks on her door, she answers the door in a sheer teddy.
    He kicks her in the face.
  • No Ride!!! A woman was driving along, and her car broke down. She decided to hitchhike to the nearest gas station. A truck driver hauling a load of chickens pulled up.
    The driver asked, 'Hey, little lady, need a lift?'
    'Yes, my car broke down, and I need a ride to the nearest gas station.'
    The driver replied, 'OK, but first you have to...
  • Johnnie`s date Little Johnnie was very lustful for a girl living in his neighborhood. He invited her to dinner, and she accepted. After dinner, he drove to a little mountain about 5 miles away from the city, and told her: 'I want you right here and now. Do it or get out and go home!' Without saying a word, she got out and walked home.
    A few weeks later, after a lot of...
  • Banta`s kids!!! Preeto was becoming frustrated with her husband, Banta`s insistence that they have sex in the dark.
    Hoping to free him from his inhibitions, during a passionate evening, she flipped on the lamp, only to discover a cucumber in Banta`s hand.
    'Is this what you`ve been...
  • Medical check-up This 70 year old woman is naked, jumping up and down on her bed laughing and singing.
    Her husband walks into the bedroom and sees her.
    He watches her awhile then says, 'You look ridiculous, what on earth are you doing?'
    She says, 'I just got...
  • Pussy willow!!! There was a farmer, sitting on the front porch of his house this one hot summer day, when this kid comes walking down the road carrying a big bundle of wire.
    'Hey kid!' the farmer says. 'Where are you going with that wire?'
    'Well,' the kid drawls, 'this here ain`t just any...
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT