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A preacher went to his church office on Monday morning and discovered a dead mule in the churchyard. He called the police. Since there did not appear to be any foul play, the police referred the preacher to the health department.
They said since there was no health threat that he should call the sanitation department.
The sanitation manager said he could not pick up the mule without authorization from the mayor.
Now the preacher knew the mayor and was not to eager to call him. The mayor had a bad temper and was generally hard to deal with, but the preacher called him anyway.
The mayor did not disappoint. He immediately began to rant and rave at the pastor and finally said, "Why did you call me anyway? Isn't it your job to bury the dead?"
The preacher paused for a brief prayer and asked the Lord to direct his response.
He was led to say, "Yes, Mayor, it is my job to bury the dead, but I always like to notify the next of kin first!"
- Insurance policy Sergeant Frank was assigned to the induction center, where he advised new recruits about their government benefits, especially their GI insurance.
It wasn`t long before Captain Jack noticed that Frank had almost a hundred percent record for insurance sales, which had never happened before.
Rather than ask about this... - Smart Santa A man with no arms walked up to a bar and asked for a beer.
Santa, the bartender, shoved the foaming glass in front of him.
'Look,' said the customer, 'I have no arms- would you please hold the glass up to my mouth?'
'Sure', said santa, and he did.
'Now,' said the customer, 'I wonder if you... - Proverbs by kids A Third grade teacher collected well known proverbs. He gave each kid in the class the first half of the proverb, and asked them to come up with the rest. Here is what the kids came up with:
Love all, trust ... me.
No news is... - Morning service By the time the morning service was to begin, only one man was in the church.
The priest said to him, 'It looks like everyone has slept in. Do you want to go home or should I preach the sermon?'
The man replied, 'When I go to... - Helping hand!!! Santa was on the side of the road hitch hiking on a very dark night and in the middle of a storm. The night was rolling and no car went by.
The storm was so strong he could hardly see a few feet ahead of him. Suddenly, he saw a car coming towards him and stop.
Santa, without thinking about it, got in the car and...