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There's this guy who shows up at a cabin where these hunters have gathered to hunt bear. Only he shows up without a gun.
The other hunters are very curious. "How you gonna get a bear without a gun?" they ask.
"Do you have a knife?"
"No," says the guy. "Do you have a club?"
“No," says the guy. "Don't you worry. I'm gonna get myself a bear. Just wait right here and see."
The guy leaves the cabin and disappears into the hills for several hours.
Eventually he happens upon a bear asleep in his den and he kicks the bear and gets it really angry. As the bear wakes up, he starts to chase after the guy, so the guy starts running back towards the cabin.
Finally the hunters hear him running down the hill and yelling, "Open the cabin door! Open the door!"
They open the door and the guy runs into the cabin and holds the door open behind him. To the terror of the other hunters, an angry bear follows close behind, running into the cabin, too.
Then the guy slams the door shut, and says, "You skin that one. I'll go get another."
- Perfect shot! A guy stood over his tee shot for what seemed an eternity, looking up, looking down, measuring the distance, figuring the wind direction and speed... driving his partner nuts.
Finally his exasperated partner says, 'What the hell is taking so long? Hit the damned ball!'
The guy answers... - Shooting the lights out! A golfer sends his ball into the trees. As he tries to bring the ball back to the fairway, he discovers a gap among the trees. With his wooden club, he tries to hit the ball to the green in his second hit. However, the ball hits a tree, bounces back and lands in...
- Santa's new car Santa had just gotten a new car and was out for a drive when he accidentally cut off a truck driver. Truck driver motioned for Santa to pull over.
When Santa did, he got out of his truck and pulled a piece of chalk from his pocket. He drew a circle on the side of the road and gruffly commanded to Santa, 'Stand in that... - Cat food A woman is enjoying a good game of bridge with her girlfriends one evening.
'Oh, no! I have to rush home and fix dinner for my husband! He's going to really be ticked if it's not ready on time.'
When she gets home, she realizes she doesn't have enough time to go to the supermarket, and all she has in the cupboard is a... - Dead Mule A preacher went to his church office on Monday morning and discovered a dead mule in the churchyard. He called the police. Since there did not appear to be any foul play, the police referred the preacher to the health department.
They said since there was no health threat that he should call the sanitation department.
The sanitation manager said...