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Santa was having problems getting it up to have sex with his wife, Jeeto, so he went to the doctor for advice.
The doctor told him the next time he wanted to have sex, to stick his finger in his wife's pussy, and then rub it under his nose, and the smell would cause his hormones to kick in, and he would obtain an erection.
That night, he decided to make his move. He turned out all the lights and got into bed. He put his finger in her pussy, and then rubbed it under his nose. He felt a tingling in his cock, and it began to stiffen.
Amazed, he decided to see what would happen if he used two fingers. He stuck them in her pussy, then rubbed them both under his nose, and his cock quickly jumped to 3/4 erect.
He decided to try 3 fingers, so he put them in her pussy, then rubbed them all around under his nose. Soon he was sporting the biggest hard on he could remember.
He said, "Jeeto, quick turn on the lights, and check this out!"
Jeeto turned on the lights, and with his dick standing tall, Santa proudly asked, "What do you think?"
Jeeto looked at him and said, "Looks like the worst nose bleed I've ever seen!"
- Intended grandchild! A man is walking past this house when a used condom comes flying out of the second story window and lands squarely on his head. Rather disgusted and absolutely furious, he goes up to the front door and starts pounding on it.
An elderly man opens it and asks him what caused him to knock so loudly.
The passerby asks... -
Taste buds! In a biology class, the professor was discussing the high glucose levels found in semen.
A young female raised her hand and asked, 'If I understand, you're saying there is a lot of glucose, as in sugar, in male semen?'
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The first child stands and says, 'My name is Mary Johnson.'
'Thank you, Mary', says the teacher.
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She's about to take off her sheer pink negligee, when the fire alarms rings!
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A policeman, seeing the sign, stopped them and told them they'd either have to remove the sign or go to jail
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