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An American, a Russian and Santa are bragging about the sharpness of their swords and how skillful they are in utilizing the sword. To demonstrate, American pulls his hair, throws it into the air, pulls out his sword and swings it across. To everybody's wonder the hair gets cut horizontally into two pieces.
Russian poohing American, pulls out his hair, throws it into the air, pulls out his sword and swings it across. To everybody’s wonder the hair gets cut vertically into two pieces
. Now its Santa's turn. He pulls out his sword. One mosquito passes by and Santa simply swings his sword around the mosquito.
The Mosquito plunges a little bit and again maintaining his course, flies away. American and Russian can't stop laughing loudly.
Turning to the duo, Santa calmly says, "Keep quiet you fools. That Mosquito won’t be able to father anyone for the rest of its life !!!"
- Artificial insemination A farmer is giving his wife last-minute instructions before heading to town to do chores.
'That fellow from close by will be along this afternoon to inseminate one of the mares. I've hung a nail by the right stall so you'll know which one I want him to impregnate.'
Satisfied that even his mentally challenged wife could understand the instructions, the farmer... - Good deal Once there was a farmer. He had two teenage sons. This farmer had just inherited some of money from his brother's recent death. He couldn't decide what son he could send to college, since he could only afford to send one. This farmer also had two abnormal, retarded turkeys.
He told his sons that whoever could... - Condom packs A man walks into a drug store with his 10-year old son. They happen to walk by the condom display, and the boy asks, 'What are these, Dad?'
To which the man matter-of-factly replies, 'Those are called condoms, son.... Men use them to have safe sex.'
'Oh I see,' replied the boys pensively. 'Yes, I've heard of that in... - Kicking Hormones! Santa was having problems getting it up to have sex with his wife, Jeeto, so he went to the doctor for advice.
The doctor told him the next time he wanted to have sex, to stick his finger in his wife's pussy, and then rub it under his nose, and the smell would cause his hormones to kick in, and he would... - Wrong dress! Banta, though scheduled for all-night duty at the station, was relieved of duty early and arrived home four hours ahead of schedule, at 2 AM.
Not wanting to wake his wife, Preeto, he undressed in the dark, crept into the bedroom and started to climb into bed.
She sleepily sat up and said...