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    A seventeen-year-old girl goes to see her mom and tells her that she has missed her period for two months.
    Very worried, the mother goes to the drugstore and buys a pregnancy kit. The test result shows that the girl is pregnant.
    Shouting, cursing, crying, the mother says, "Who was the pig that did this to you? I want to know!!"
    The girl picks up the phone and makes a call. Half an hour later a brand new Mercedes stops at their house, a mature and distinguished man, with grey hair and impeccably dressed in a very expensive suit steps out of it and enters the house.
    He sits in the living room with the father, the mother and the girl, and tells them: "Good morning, your daughter has informed me of the problem. However, I can't marry her because of my personal family situation, but I'll take charge. If a girl is born I will bequeath her 3 stores, 2 townhouses, a beach villa and Rs 75,00,000 bank account. If a boy is born, my legacy will be a couple of factories, and a Rs one crore bank account. If it is twins, a factory and Rs one crore each. However, if there is a miscarriage..."
    At this point, the father, who had remained silent all this time, places a hand firmly on the man's shoulder and tells him, "You'll screw her again!!!"
  • Sore tooth!!! Banta walks into a bar and reads a sign that hangs over the bar: FREE BEER FOR THE PERSON WHO CAN PASS THE TEST! So Banta asks the bartender what the test is.
    Bartender, 'Well, FIRST you have to drink that whole gallon of pepper tequila, the whole thing at once and you can't make a face while doing it. SECOND...
  • Don't hit the ball! A husband and wife were out playing golf.
    They tee off and one drive goes to the right and one drive goes to the left.
    The wife finds her ball in a patch of buttercups. She grabs a club and takes a mighty swing at the ball. She hits a beautiful second shot, but in the process she...
  • Peeing lesson! A mother taught her son to go to the bathroom by the numbers.
    '1. Open your fly.
    2. Take out your equipment.
    3. Pull back...
  • Farting gay! Two gay men were in bed fooling around when all of a sudden the door bell rings.
    The first gay man tells the second, 'Don't cum until I come back', and he rushes off to answer the door.
    After a few minutes...
  • Test Results! Santa is lying in bed in a hospital with an oxygen mask over his mouth. A young nurse appears to sponge his face and hands.
    'Nurse,' he mumbles from behind the mask, 'Are my testicles black?'
    Embarrassed the young nurse replies...
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