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    There's a man trying to cross the street. As he steps off the curb a car comes screaming around the corner and heads straight for him. The man walks faster, trying to hurry across the street, but the car changes lanes and is still coming at him.
    So the guy turns around to go back, but the car changes lanes again and is still coming at him.
    By now, the car is so close and the man so scared that he just freezes and stops in the middle of the road.
    The car gets real close, then swerves at the last possible moment and screeches to a halt right next him.
    The driver rolls down the window.
    The driver is a squirrel.
    The squirrel says to the man, "See, it's not as easy as it looks, is it?"
  • True friend! Murphy and his friend George go golfing together one Saturday morning, as they have done for 20 years straight.
    Later that day, Murphy returns home exhausted, and plops down in the easy chair. His wife is concerned and asks if something went wrong with his game.
    'No, no,' he replied, 'I had the...
  • Bad horse The story is told of a day when Queen Elizabeth had the Duke of Edinburgh over for a cup of tea. The conversation turned equestrian and the Queen was telling the Duke about her new prize horse.
    After a spell of ranting and raving over this horse...
  • Drowning!!! One day, a diver was enjoying the aquatic world twenty feet below sea level. He noticed a guy at the same depth, but with no scuba gear whatsoever.
    The diver went below another twenty feet, and the guy...
  • Nothing to worry! While cruising at 40,000 feet, the airplane shuddered and George looked out of the window.
    'Good lord!' he screamed, 'one of the engines just blew up!'
    Other passengers left their seats and came running over; suddenly the aircraft was rocked by a second blast as yet another...
  • Praying Johnny! Little Johnny was walking along the railroad tracks when suddenly he got his foot caught under one of the railroad ties. He tried to get it out but it was really stuck. As he struggled to free his foot, he heard a noise and turned around. To his horror he saw a train coming.
    Panicked he started to pray...
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