Considerate Statue !

  •  

    A woman was in bed with her lover when she heard her husband opening the front door.
    "Hurry!" she said, "Stand in the corner."
    She quickly rubbed baby oil allover him and then she dusted him with talcum powder."Don`t move until I tell you to." she whispered.
    "Just pretend you are a statue."
    "What is this, honey?" the husband asked as he entered the room.
    "Oh, it is just a statue." she replied nonchalantly. "The Smiths bought one for their bedroom. I liked the idea so much, I got one for us, too."
    No more was said about the "statue". Later that night they went to sleep. Around two in the morning the husband got out of bed, went into the kitchen, and returned with a sandwich and a glass of milk.
    "Here" he said to the statue, "Eat this. I stood like an idiot at the Smiths for three days and nobody offered me so much as a glass of water."
  • Contagious! A beautiful, voluptuous woman goes to a gynecologist. The doctor takes one look at this woman and all professionalism immediately goes out the window. Right away he tells her to undress. After she has disrobed he begins to...
  • Tight nuts ! A priest gets a flat tire fixed. As the car`s coming down on the lift, the priest asks the mechanic, 'Are the lug nuts...
  • Daffynitions!!! Here are some definitions: Kissing - upper persuassion for a lower invasion.Brassiere - A device for making mountains out of moleholesAnd some more...
  • Diana and Parton! Princess Diana and Dolly Parton die on the same day... both appear at the Pearly Gates, but St. Peter tells them there is only room for one more in heaven today. So he asks them both why they should be allowed in over the other. Dolly pulls off her top and says....
  • Boy Scouts The boy Scouts had made camp after a long hike, and that evening they sat round the campfire for some rest and recreation. Two of them began comparing notes. Scout A: Mine`s bigger than...
ADVERTISEMENT
ADVERTISEMENT